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play you a prostitune on my whoremonica
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I made some macro's of beautiful dachshunds


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If you are not listed here, you should probably remove me from your friends list.

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BRADLEY COOPER PICSPAM

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Lol this took me awhile, (but hey time flies when you're having fun,
eh, eh, eh, do you get my meaning do ya do ya kid ), so comment this please lol.
Feel free to oogle this post to your motherfuckin' heart's content.
I hope I provided more material for your fap folders, y'all.

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I like to give advice, so what's a better to exercise my talents then making an advice post?
I'm like Agony Aunt, or Magony Aunt, if you want.

itt you ask, i tell
itt questions/pep talk/sex/etc

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+something you like about me
-something you dislike

anon is on, do your best/worst

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Tonight I went to a restaraunt owned by ~Bootsy Collins~

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VoicePost
307K 1:35
(no transcription available)
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This game is highly hypothetical, but for the lulz or what-have-you.

You are a poor college student, you have got no dinero whatsoever, and one day you hear that the girl next door to your dorm room just bought a new ipod! You gripe to her about your financial woes and she get's a mischievious look in her eye and tells you to meet her at a specific address downtown.
You go there after your Philosophy class and you find out, to your horrified chagrin, that she has sent you to a strip club!
You go in anyway, against your better judgement and you see her workin' the pole! It all hits you in one fell swoop, so that's how she makes her money.

You are a desperate college student:
What will your stripper alias be? Candyass
What will you wear? Two blue stars on my nipples. Red and white striped thong.
What music will you dance to? I'm A Slave 4 U - Britney Spears or Whereever, Whenever - Shakira
What will your clientele look like? Rich-ass muthafucka's

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VoicePost
963K 5:10
“ALEXA
MY BEST FRIEND IS CAITTIN
LOL I JUST SAID HER FULL NAME ON THE INTERNET!!!!
SHE USED TO BE SCANDALOUS AND NOW SHE'S BLAISEICALLY
I SHOULD IMPERSONATE VICTOR DINA IS PUSHY
SOMETHING ABOUT A DICK
ROPLEY GOOD JOB I AM GONNA READ TO U
CHAPTER 5 CHAPTER 5
I SKIPPED CHAPTER 4
SO UH YOU WANT ANYTHING AS SHE STEPPED THRU DA DOORWAY
SOMETHING ABOUT AWKWARD ARM RUBBING AND A SMALL APARTMENT
HIS PARENTS KICKED HIM DA FUCK OUT!
omg theyre gonna do it in da refrigerator
UH WE GOT TUNA EW NO DINA SQUISHED HER FACE
LOL MAGGIE YOU ALWAYS WRITE ABOUT YOGURT!
WHERE IS THE REST OF THE CAIT/MARSHALL STORY BITCH
O POT? DINA ACCEPTED A SOFT SQUARE OF POT BROWNIE LOL
OM NOM NOM POT IT TASTES LIKE CHOCOLATE SHE ENVELOPED IT WITH HER MOUTH
DINA STICKS TO RED RED WIIINE STAY CLOSE TO MEEEE
SHE KEEPS EATIN DA BROWNIES SHE DONT FEEL IT
WHAT THE FUCK EVER I WANT MY WINE HOLY SHIT DAMN
ALEC SLAMMED A CABINET DOOR DINA O DA GOOD STUFF!
ALEC'S LIQUOR CABINET DIFFERENTLY NEED HELP DINA UNCROSSED HER ARMS AND GOT SOME VODKA AND SHOT GLASSES
HEY! AFTER WE TAKE A SHOT WE GOTTA KISS! SHRIEKING LAUGH HAHAHAHAHAHHA
ALEC PUCKERED VERY VERY YUMMY VODKA

DA END”

Transcribed by: multiple users
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play you a prostitune on my whoremonica
Name: play you a prostitune on my whoremonica
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